Political and topical news and commentary
adnauseam's Articles In Humor
April 3, 2006 by adnauseam
1. Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship. She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays. 2. We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California and mine is in Texas. 3. I take my wife everywhere..... but she keeps finding her way back. 4. I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our anniversary. "Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said. So I suggested the kitchen. 5. We always hold hands. If I let go, s...
April 3, 2006 by adnauseam
1. Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship. She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays. 2. We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California and mine is in Texas. 3. I take my wife everywhere..... but she keeps finding her way back. 4. I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our anniversary. "Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said. So I suggested the kitchen. 5. We always hold hands. If I let go, s...
April 21, 2006 by adnauseam
Ah, the big six-oh! You know you're sixty when: -you confuse a sand wedge with a putter. -you have more hair in your ears and nose than on your head. -traffic cops call you "sir", but still write the ticket. -your dog regards you as a pouff. -your wife regards you as an Egyptian relic. -men aged forty call you "Pops". -you wander supermarkets aimlessly looking for a toilet. -you cannot remember your PIN at the ATM. -you only get an erection from a full bladder. -you don't care wher...
April 21, 2006 by adnauseam
Ah, the big six-oh! You know you're sixty when: -you confuse a sand wedge with a putter. -you have more hair in your ears and nose than on your head. -traffic cops call you "sir", but still write the ticket. -your dog regards you as a pouff. -your wife regards you as an Egyptian relic. -men aged forty call you "Pops". -you wander supermarkets aimlessly looking for a toilet. -you cannot remember your PIN at the ATM. -you only get an erection from a full bladder. -you don't care wher...
February 5, 2007 by adnauseam
Cairo is known world-wide for its infamous black and white taxis (would-be tourists will be pleased to know that we have new yellow cabs too). These taxis are often museum pieces dating from the sixties (shades of Cuba?), and some are held together by hand-made parts and a lot of faith. King of the "black and whites" is the virtually indestructible Peugeot 504, a vehicle seen in most "developing" African countries. The 504 is the prince of Cairo's taxis and many are cherished by their owners....
February 5, 2007 by adnauseam
Cairo is known world-wide for its infamous black and white taxis (would-be tourists will be pleased to know that we have new yellow cabs too). These taxis are often museum pieces dating from the sixties (shades of Cuba?), and some are held together by hand-made parts and a lot of faith. King of the "black and whites" is the virtually indestructible Peugeot 504, a vehicle seen in most "developing" African countries. The 504 is the prince of Cairo's taxis and many are cherished by their owners....
November 19, 2006 by adnauseam
Here are some of the things I have learnt as I grow older--as the stomach turns and the mind spins, as they say: 1. Wet wipes have become important in my life. I buy the baby ones because they won't sting my tired butt. 2. If I lose my glasses I cannot do any worthwhile work. May as well take a day off. 3. I keep two sets of keys for everything but often lose both. 4. The quality of toilet paper is extremely important. 5. I collect old banknotes. The new notes don't hang around too lon...
November 19, 2006 by adnauseam
Here are some of the things I have learnt as I grow older--as the stomach turns and the mind spins, as they say: 1. Wet wipes have become important in my life. I buy the baby ones because they won't sting my tired butt. 2. If I lose my glasses I cannot do any worthwhile work. May as well take a day off. 3. I keep two sets of keys for everything but often lose both. 4. The quality of toilet paper is extremely important. 5. I collect old banknotes. The new notes don't hang around too lon...
August 22, 2006 by adnauseam
I wrote this short play for the Aussies, Brits and South Africans among us. There are Americans who may appreciate it but I do sympathise with them: they do not play the "Glorious game". Scene: The Oval Players: Two umpires. Umpire 1: This is a cricket ball. Umpire 2: Yes, funny enough it is. Umpire 1: It has been scratched. Umpire 2: Yes, yes it has. Umpire 1: This looks fishy. Umpire 2: Yes, could have been a fish hook. Umpire 1: This is serious. These blokes coul...
August 22, 2006 by adnauseam
I wrote this short play for the Aussies, Brits and South Africans among us. There are Americans who may appreciate it but I do sympathise with them: they do not play the "Glorious game". Scene: The Oval Players: Two umpires. Umpire 1: This is a cricket ball. Umpire 2: Yes, funny enough it is. Umpire 1: It has been scratched. Umpire 2: Yes, yes it has. Umpire 1: This looks fishy. Umpire 2: Yes, could have been a fish hook. Umpire 1: This is serious. These blokes coul...