Do you have the Perfect Marriage?

Let me know your thoughts on marriage.

Published on March 23, 2006 By adnauseam In Blogging

Do you know some secrets to a perfect marriage? I actually think that there is no perfect marriage (how could there be when we mortals are so full of faults?)

However, I deign to give advice and ask for comment.

My wife and I have been married for 35 years. There are things that we disagree about and things that irritate us about one another. In fact we get into such heated disagreements that ornaments fly!

However there are positive points about our marriage (this is so personal but it may help others and others may help us-- Obviously, for discretion, I shall not get too personal):

-After 35 years we desire one another (there is always innuendo).
-We admire one another.
- We are totally empathetic of one another.
- We are the parents of two children who are not perfect in every way, but perfect in our eyes (because children, even an 18 and 26 year old, know that a parent's love never ceases). That we see them , in our image ,as perfect ,consoles us.
- Our children have grown up empathetic and responsible and concerned for their parents.
- We often (wife, children, husband), irritate the s___t out of one another.
- We have learnt the greatest lesson taught by a long and happy marriage: Our kids feel secure in our love.

A common denominator is PEACE in our home. Peace reigns above all else, then comes respect, admiration, encouragement and friendship.

Of course it's not perfect and there are many lessons still to be learnt. What do Joeusers think in terms of their own marriages?

Comments

Dr Guy

on Mar 23, 2006

I agree that there is no 'perfect marraige', but I think you have listed the important parts to a great marriage very well.

jennybean

on Mar 23, 2006

I also agree that there is no such thing as a perfect marriage, but it sounds like you two are quite happy! I have only been married for about two years now, but my husband and I have been together for about 7 years. I love our relationship, and I feel we have a very healthy marriage. I think it is really important to be friends in a marriage. My husband is also my best friend, and because of this we are very close and can talk about anything together. We also have a mutual respect for each other which I really believe you have to have in a successful marriage.

Gideon MacLeish

on Mar 23, 2006

In most cases, marriage is as perfect or as imperfect as you make it. There is no "perfect" marriage, but an ideal marriage is one where both members learn to complement the other's areas of weakness. I would add that you should NEVER publicly criticize your spouse; even jokes can be damaging in this area, and that you should NEVER call names or bring up past wrongs in arguments. Those are two pretty hard and fast rules I adhere to.

KFC Kickin For Christ

on Mar 23, 2006

Congrats on your longevity. It gets so discouraging today to see so many give up when the marriage should be just getting going. We're in our 25th year and I would say it's about as perfect or ideal as one can get. We rarely fight anymore. When we were younger we had some doozies but now it's a rare occurrence. I remember throwing things at him and wouldn't dream of doing that today. I look back and am amazed that I would do such a thing now.

With a good marriage comes children that have a good model for marriage and hopefully they too will know that when two people come together in marriage it's a committment that should not be broken for foolish reasons.

I work in the CPA business. Doing joint returns sometimes turn into doing them single or head of household the next year way too often. Most divorces we see seem to be in that 7-15 year range. I remember that being the hardest time too but I knew I was in this for better or worse. Now I look back and see that those were growing pains and we are now reaping the benefits for staying together through those rapids of life as we learn to grow together.

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